Bad News

Our second meeting with our fertility doctor was last week. As we parked at Hershey Med I thought back to our first appointment a few weeks before. I had been so excited for that visit and then felt so hopeful when it was finished. For some reason I had a tiny bit of dread as we headed in to the hospital for our second visit. I had a feeling that it wasn't going to be a pleasant visit.


It was a short meeting. We were in and out of the hospital in 25 minutes. It doesn't take long to learn bad news, I suppose.


Josh and I have decided to keep the details to ourselves, but in short, it is probably not going to ever be possible for us to have biological children. The first test results were very bleak. Unfortunately this means we have to go through more tests over the next few months to make sure the first tests weren't a fluke and then to see if there is anything "wrong" that can be corrected medically. The doctor told us that in only 30% of these cases can they actually determine a cause. The other 70% of people with this same issue find that it can never be explained. It's not anything we're doing wrong. There's nothing we could try to fix it. It has nothing to do with medications we're on, losing or gaining weight, eating differently, herbal remedies, or anything else. It just is what it is. We're still hoping we could be in that 30% and that if we are that there is something that can be done to help. Honestly, we have strong doubts.


At this time we've decided to move forward with the recommended tests and see what happens. Thankfully at this point it seems like I would be a good candidate to carry an adopted baby (embryo adoption). I'm feeling like we will probably be submitting an application for adoption within the next 3-5 months.


Waiting stinks.