Adoption Options

With adoption there are many options. None of them are easy. Here are my thoughts on a few:

Domestic Adoption:

In a perfect world this would be a wonderful solution for couples who are unable to conceive. In the actual world it can be a traumatic process. It’s sinfully expensive for one thing (when using an agency and adopting a “healthy” infant). Most disturbingly though in many states the birth mother has a full month after the baby is born to “change her mind”. Can you imagine setting up your nursery, having a baby shower, and bringing your baby home all the while knowing that they could come take him/her away from you at any time in that first month. I don’t have it in me. I wouldn’t be strong enough to handle that. I would fight to the death to keep my child. Domestic adoption is not for me.

Domestic Adoption of a Child/Infant with Disabilities or an Older Child/Sibling Group:

I lumped these two together for two reasons:

1. These type of adoptions are very affordable

2. I don’t feel prepared at all to take care of a child with special needs or older children. At least not right now.

Foreign Adoption:

I love foreign adoption. It’s one of the things most precious to my heart. I definitely want to adopt from China, however this is becoming more and more difficult. We’re still 2 years away from meeting the age requirement to adopt from China, but we also must somehow have a net worth of $80,000. Seems so far off right now.

This past summer I went to Guatemala. The children were so precious. I would very much like to adopt from Guatemala. Right now that is not an option due to some issues with the Guatemalan government and our Government regarding adoption. It’s complicated. Not an option at this time.

As I’m sure you can guess, foreign adoption is expensive and time consuming. Costs range from $18,000-40,000 and can take 18 months to years.

Embryo Adoption:

This is an exciting new adoption option. Many couples in the US have been able to build a family using IVF. This has created a new problem for many; what to do with remaining embryos. Pro-life people believe (rightfully) that life begins at conception. This means that the remaining embryos are little lives that are important and deserve a chance to live. Through embryo adoption couples with infertility can legally adopt the embryo before it is implanted into the adoptive mother.

This is something I would have never considered before. Becoming pregnant this way is a difficult and painful process. Each implantation of embryos only have a 30% chance of ending with pregnancy. That means the process often must be repeated for months before a pregnancy occurs. It is also expensive: $8,000 plus home study and other fees. Possibly as much as $15,000 all said and done.

There is one major “pro” with this adoption route: when you deliver your baby and hold him/her for the first time you know he/she is yours. No fear that a birth mother or father will change their mind. No waiting months and months to see your baby while he/she is living across the globe in an orphanage far away from you. This baby is yours and you get to carry it with you for 9 months and be the first person to kiss his/her face. I want that. Can you blame me?